Sunday, March 22

Taliban kill Islam

Gosh, I thought Savile Row and the English were strict about the sartorial standards but the Taliban take it to fantastic lengths. Imagine this situation. I quote:

A teacher who once fought as a mujahideen against Soviet occupation forces in Afghanistan as been gunned down by the Taliban in Pakistan’s troubled Swat valley for not hiking up his ‘salwar’ or trousers above his ankles.

The militants say hiking up the trousers is essential for offering prayers. Former mujahideen Amjad Islam, who was working as a teacher in a private school in Swat, was gunned down yesterday for not hiking his salwar above his ankles. The militants then went to Islam’s house and gunned down his father, Ghani Akbar, a lawyer by profession.

You are right, obviously it was his father’s fault for not teaching his son to know about the right length of his trouser legs.

Islam’s body was later hung by the militants from a pole in the College Square in Matta town and locals were warned not to touch it till Friday. The body was taken down and moved to Islam’s house after a local jirga intervened.

You have to admire the chaps. I mean, they are so well meaning that they want to now use Islam’s body as a dummy to show the recommended length of the salwar to all the rest of the population. Too bad the local jirga did not appreciate their well meaning desire to show off Islam.

Locals also said Islam’s father was a religious and humble man who was well respected in the area.

Ah, but he did not know about the right salwar length. So obviously he is not religious enough.

Truly, Islam is dead. Killed by the Students of Islam (that’s what Taliban means). Over 2 inches of cloth. On the ankles.

The ironies are just gobsmacking.

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Reviewing Classifieds

Was stuck waiting for a meeting to begin when my eyes fell on the free morning rag, the Metro. This is handed out to tube and train travellers in London so is pretty widely read I would have said. 


It was opened to the classifieds and some of them were very interesting so took the liberty of snapping some pictures. As you can see, the great and good of the great unwashed human herd land up in these pages. Flights, gay sex, basic jobs and some other weird and wonderful advertisements are all here.


Shiekh Lamin offers positive results on healing, clairvoyancy, advising, family matters, loved ones, depressions, court cases, anti social behaviour, stress, exams and career. And no payment requested up front, just pay after everything is hunky dory.


Holy cow, here’s another one, Mr. Kajali, but he has business transactions to his repetoire compared to the aforementioned Sheikh


But as with everything, there is specialisation and competition. Mr. Kajali should not rest relaxed, he has competition. Cheik Yahuba has 37 years of experience sorting out problems and besides the others, he brings back lost loved ones and also sorts out sexual problems AND throws in business problem solutions in for free :)


But people sneer at just Sheikhs and Mr.’s, now we have a Professor Touba, who seems to specialise in all effective problems. And he seems to have a hyperspecialisation in business problems. Professor, eh? Now that’s something significant, you dont get professors for cheap, you know? And that’s why he isnt promising payment after positive results, I am sure he will want to get payment upfront, or is that because he is a clairvoyant? Knows who is a good credit risk or not? I think the wanker bankers are missing a trick, instead of investing billions in GARP training, people and systems in risk management, we just get some of these worthies. Bingo, problem solved, eh?

Plus a Professor!, I am missing a trick, even Ivy League Professors will be upset that they do not get a chance to claim all these wonderful qualities that Professor Touba is claiming.

But take a look on the top right, second down, they are now going for double barrelled names, its not just Mr. or Sheikh, but its Mr. Sheikh Ibrahema and he has speed as his unique selling proposition. He talks about speedy resolutions. Speedy Sheikh, eh?


Then we have Mr. Salem (in pink, no less!), Mr. Taslimi, Mr. Haje Makil, Mr. Dembo and Mr. Bama) bringing up the rear…

btw. where are the women? bloody male dominated patriachal gits crowding out the women from this field. I could have sworn that women are the perfect Clairvoyants...(says the man well experienced with the fault finding women in his life ranging from mother, wife, daughter, sisters, girlfriends, co workers, etc. etc.)

Also note the advertisement for flights to Erbil, Iraq on the right. Heh, they are offering £399 for a one way ticket. Tells you all, no? And that too via Air Olympic. Going to Iraq on a airline named after the abode of Gods with a one way ticket is just too close to death, danger and heaven for my comfort….


The security training wasn't that interesting, but when you are tired of getting security trained, you can go into the topless bar. Drinks are £10 quid each!, but it was a relief that they talked about the fact that there are hostess’s available. The idea of having topless hairy man-breasted men serving me £10 quid drinks was not really palatable to me personally. But the idea of juxtaposing security training with topless bars just struck me as funny.

Photobucket Photobucket

And then you have another interesting combination. The London’s Women’s Clinic wants sperm donation and the men will get paid expenses, but just below are two advertisements for services (Thai Spa and Oriental Massage) where release of male sperm entails payment on part of the men. See the business idea that I am getting to? I am surprised nobody twigged to this. Sometimes newspapers throw up the weirdest of things..


Fascinating bookshelves

Now this is a great page showing some fantastic bookshelves. This was my favourite:

Followed by

Although not so good for my peace of mind, lol.

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An angel comes to town

People see me coming and then hide from me. I am now turning into a giant bore for people who can assist in getting money or equipment for the charity. But does that stop me? Of course not, BD keeps on barrelling ahead with people despite them being totally so not interested.

It is not easy to get hold of equipment as I have alluded before, but I was at a corporate dinner and bumped into a friend who was previously the CTO of a very large universal bank. She gave birth to a lovely little baby and then has now rejoined the bank as their head of strategy and planning.

She was quite interested in the story and gave me the name of their hardware provider. This hardware provider takes care of the disposal of their assets. I met the lady concerned from their hardware provider and it became very clear that they have other commercial angles to this. She asked me if there was a chance of me getting them a contact at my bank, some sort of quid pro quo for her, so that if i get her some business then she can see if some equipment can be shaken loose. Needless to say, and I know pride is a bad thing in charity, I walked away. Not interested.

I thought that was the end of the story and gave it up as a learning experience. But to my surprise, my friend called me up out of the blue and said, I have 30 PC’s and laptops for you. I was near over the moon.

I think I have mentioned before how the recession is meaning that more and more children across the country are unable to afford PC’s and laptops, more and more children are falling ill. So Pat is constantly bombarded by requests for equipment and the pressure is going up and up. It is so tough to even talk to these students, teachers and hospitals. I dont know how Pat does it, really.

30 computers means that we will be able to help 30 students, 30 children who otherwise might not have been able to study, to work, to learn about Egypt or Greece, to understand algebra or check out the football scores online or create their websites or mash utilities. Makes me happy that few more bits of knowledge are being created in this world and few more smiles are going to come because an angel in the bank decided to help in getting these computers to the charity.

I know she does not want me to use her name, but all I can say again is, THANK YOU.