Sunday, January 3

Right after artificial virginity comes artificial foreskin

The mind boggles. And this too right after I blogged about artificial virginity. (warning, this is NSFW). What the hell do you need this for if you have your tip snipped off? They manage to educate you:

Being circumcised affects the natural operation, appearance and sensitivity of the penis. During recent years much medical research has been carried out in several countries into the function and purpose of the foreskin. There is now conclusive medical evidence that a circumcised penis with the glans exposed has less nerve receptors and is less effective than a naturally covered penis. Over the years the exposed glans becomes less sensitive. There is well-documented evidence which shows that this can, and often does, have a disastrous effect on sexual performance, its consequences, and ultimately, on self esteem.

oooo, so you lose the feeling. Right, so what do i do about it? Well, its simple, you buy this piece of kit. They have helpfully given a diagram:


Erm, and what does this get me?

•A flexible, protective and comfortable retractable cover for the glans

•An affordable artificial foreskin which is washable and semi-disposable

•Immediate and instant protection of the glans from underwear and the elements

•A program for reversing lack of sensitivity in the glans

•A deeper and more enjoyable orgasm

•Natural dekeratinization of the glans (thinning of the existing calloused skin)

•A softer and smoother glans which is more sensitive to touch and feel

•An artificial foreskin which gives the appearance of an uncircumcised penis

•A feeling of warmth, security and self-esteem.

But not all men are born equal, blah blah blah..Fear not young man, we have catered for this eventuality here. heheh, and they have 11 different sizes but no difference to the price thereby conclusively proving that size does not matter, at least in some cases.

But but but, what will my wife/gf/bf say? think? Ah, we have thoughtfully provided you with a page which addresses your concerns:

The man in your life can worry about many things, and the older he gets the more his body concerns him. While it is easy to try and reassure him, one area where reassurance sometimes is not enough, is his penis. He may have many questions, and self doubts, most of which are only real in his mind….but one thing that frequently is true for a circumcised man, is the lack of sensitivity in his penis.  Years of wear and abrasion against his clothing has toughened his glans on the head of his penis, and as such he is likely to be receiving less stimulation during sex than an uncircumcised man.
Most ladies claim that part of their desire is to know that their partner is receiving the maximum pleasure possible during intercourse. If your man has been circumcised, wearing the SenSlip on a daily basis will help restore the sensitivity to the head of his penis and therefore increase his sexual pleasure.Have you ever bought your man boxer shorts, only to find that he cannot wear them as they make him sore? When wearing the SenSlip, boxer shorts or underwear made from any material is no longer a problem, as the SenSlip protects the most sensitive part of his penis from friction caused by movement. Just think how many women get ‘Joggers Nipple’ caused by movement of their breast against their clothing, now imagine the extra movement at the end of the penis - OUCH!

But hark, there are warnings:

    • The SenSlip is NOT to be used for penetration.
    • The SenSlip is not a sex toy, your man puts it on in the morning and takes it off at night, just like his shirt.

Each will set you back $11.9 if you buy a pack of 10 lasting for 10-12 weeks.

I was laughing my head off at reading this. WTF indeed.

Update: just the day after I closed this post, I came across this one. Lucky (Green) Betty Pubic Hair Dye Kit. I quote from the Product Description

The Lucky Betty Pubic Hair Dye Kit dyes "the hair down there" a bright green reminiscent of lepracons, Christmas trees and all things green.  Included in each box is a complete kit for 1-2 (or more!) applications of hair dye.  Each application lasts 4-5 weeks and safely keeps all of your hair the color you want it to be.  Includes various Christmas themed stencils. Totally fun and a vibrant surprise!
Introducing the first safe color specially formulated for the hair down there. Colors naturally, covers gray, and enhances to match your glorious locks above.  This easy-to-use, no-drip formula gives you the perfect finishing touch, and makes the "hair down there" as au natural as ever!  From now on, when you highlight or color your hair, don't forget your Betty color!

Notice the spelling of leprechauns. Then again, people who dye their pubic hair bright green wouldn't really let a little thing like a spelling mistake stop you. And it covers up gray hair.., lol lol lol.

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